. My boss' church bought a large furniture store and we are doing what is referred to as a "build out". Which means almost totally gutting out the inside and rebuilding it into a church. It's kept us working pretty steady since Christmas. The good news is that they are in the process of getting another church to build right after this one's done.
We'll see how that goes.
which I come out of in time to take a shower and go to bed. I blame the drive home. I feel good when I leave work. I think of all the good things I'm gonna do when I get home. But by the time I swing the blazer door open, it's all I can do to make it inside. That's lame, I know. I've been trying, for weeks, to get up to my cousin's so I can see my Godson. It's just not happening. And that's frustrating.
That's the good part. I pretty much stunk at the rest of it. I was rusty. I didn't mind stinking at weight over bar, but my heavy hammer was embarrassing. 
And I didn't even get 18' in the sheaf (but people were telling me that the bag was too tight and hanging up on their forks also). 
And I couldn't pick the caber because the ground was so soft that I couldn't get my footing and drive off them. I'm not trying to make excuses, just observations. 
Many versions of this are floating around the internet (my boss sent one to me), and we thought it was funny enough — and true enough — to share:
1. About those carrot sticks. Avoid them. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the holiday spirit. In fact if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it’s rare. In fact, it’s even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can’t find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It’s not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnogaholic or something. It’s a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole milk. If it’s skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a holiday party is to eat other people’s food for free. Lots of it. Hello? Remember college?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s Day. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them, and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They’re like a beautiful pair of shoes. You can’t leave them behind. You’re not going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean have some standards, mate.
10. And one final tip: If you don’t feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven’t been paying attention. Reread tips. Start over. But hurry! Cookieless January is just around the corner.
